BINCHY

I wrote this blog a long time ago and I thought I'd post it here:

I met Binchy while I was working in HongKong Bank. He was new then, and was picking up his ATM card and I was the one who was available to entertain him that time. The moment I saw him, I recognized him. I asked him point blank if he was the guy in the fun Purefoods commercial, where he was so tall he had to bend forward to be inside the camera’s frame. He gave me this warm shy smile and said that yes, he was that guy. That started our friendship.

He worked somewhere in the upper floors of the building and whenever we had the chance, we would chat in the computer. There was nothing romantic about what we had – it was very platonic, the kind that a lot of people would love to have. A genuine friendship. He would probably the type of man I would like to have as a big brother (alhough he was about 3 years younger than I am) because he always showed concern and is always available for a conversation. One time, he even warned me to be cautious of one of his married officers in the bank who would, when he spots Binchy chatting with me, try to include himself in the conversation and send flirty messages to me. Well, that man actually likes flirting and he did have a reputation, but that’s another story. Maybe not even worth telling about.

Binchy and I were not really that close as in best friends, but close enough for me to call him a real friend.

On the day that the bank’s union called a strike, he immediately went down to Customer Services where I was, and helped me and my friend pack up our things and carried our bags outside. He stayed with us during the day and during the night of the picket. One time I saw a rare side of him – he and the other guys in the picket were having a confrontation of some sort and he had this look of grim determination. His face always had a smile but that time, there was no hint of a smile at all.

And then all of a sudden, he stopped showing up in the picketline. I figured he got himself another job, maybe, as others did at that time.

Years went on without hearing anything from or about him and then here comes my mom telling me that there was somebody new in Goodyear where she works, that that he came from HSBC – well, it was Binchy! My mother and her sister, Tita Alice (who also works for Goodyear that time), both had only good words about him. He was so happy to know that they were my relatives and would call them Titas. He would always greet them in the morning with a kiss on the cheek. My tita would say that he is a very charming person. Mukhang "kras" niya.

I even tried to match him with one of my sisters, but it didn’t push through.

I didn’t forget to invite him to my wedding and I was glad that he came to attend. I remember him wearing his barong tagalog, and holding a long umbrella, for it was raining hard that time. He was very tall so I could easily see him, and he had that usual radiant warm smile.

I heard that he got married and had a daughter. I was so happy to hear this news because I am confident he would make a great husband and father.

Sadly, his marriage didn’t last, I think, but people in their office would often hear him talking lovingly on the phone with his daughter.

As years went by, another Tita came to know him, and my sister’s 3M colleagues as well, because he plays badminton in some inter-company competitions. How small the world is!

When my family went to Australia, I was still thinking about this friend, for some reason. I sent him an email, thanking him for being a friend (I’m not sure why). But all his emails were simply quotations from the Bible. I didn’t even know he was religious, or maybe he just became one after a while.

Then one day, he sent me an email asking me about life in Australia. During the exchange of our emails, I gathered he wasn’t happy with his job in Goodyear anymore, and the tone of his messages were quite sad but accepting. He said he wants to settle in Australia as well, and I got excited about this – I was envisioning seeing him again and maybe accommodating him in our home if he needed a place to stay before he gets settled in.

Things however, were not meant to be. One day in February this year, I received a message from my sister that Binchy had a heart attack, had flat lined and they had to revive him. I was shocked and worried and sent messages to my mother and my friends to pray for him. I was praying a lot and was mentally speaking with him to hang on, not to give up.

On Feb 6 he hasn’t regained consciousness, I received a message that "his blood pressure and heart rate are still erratic, but his lungs are clearer, although his fever is still more than 40 degrees". A text message on Feb 7 said that they couldn’t initiate dialysis because they couldn’t find his veins as he is bloated. On Feb 8, 2008, 2:45 am, my friend JEREMY RICHARD V. MAYUGA, or BINCHY as he is fondly called, passed away. He was just 37.

It was such a sad day and I recalled how he looked like when I last saw him in my wedding. Such a fine fellow, such a good friend, such a warm smile. Such a short time.